Off of my training plan because of a headache

  I am a seasonal allergy kind of girl.  I have been having the sniffles on my rides lately, and I know it is just that lovely time of year when I will need to deal with my runny nose and watery eyes.  I take my over-the-counter drugs, and continue on my merry way.  Well, one fateful Thursday, I decided to tackle my to-do list and knock out reseeding the lawn for winter.  I am terribly allergic to the summer grass and had just let it die rather than endure the sniffling and sneezing brought on by mowing it, and so there was really little to do but clean up a few patches and get some fresh grass going.  The project required a trip to home depot, and my father to bring along his new toy- a pickup truck.  Projects with dad are a very fun way to spend an afternoon, and we did a great job getting the lawn reseeded.  I am very excited to see how the grass turns out.
  The allergies were as they usually are with any work on the lawn.  I had to take my contacts out and had to endure some sniffles, but nothing that made me worry.  That evening, the headache started.  My plan to ride 100 miles and run 20 miles were still on the agenda, but the next morning, as I put together my camelback and checked my tires on my bike, I came to the realization that this headache was getting increasingly worse.  Depressed by the thought of being taken out of commission by my sinuses, I made some tea, and sipped it slowly while telling myself the headache would clear in a minute and we would be off for another adventure.  Now, 4 days later, the headache remains, and I am pretty convinced that the headache is actually a sinus infection.  Oh, we are so weak that our tiny bacterial foes can bring us down without warning.  And now, I am going to go to the doctor for my chemical warfare against these tiny invaders.
  I am getting my hopes up that I will be well by Thursday and able to do a ride out to the IM course to check out what I will be doing on race day. 

I remember now, I actually like doing this

  The temperatures are starting to drop off, and training is becoming a lot more fun.  My run this weekend was 20 miles and ended at 1:00 in the afternoon.  That means I didn't have to roll out of bed at 5 AM to get started, which takes a great deal of effort for a night shifter.  I rolled out of bed around 8 or 9 every day this weekend.  This allowed me to enjoy staying up a little later, and gave me more time in the sunshine. 
  I took my bike in to get my Zipps put on.  As always, I got a lecture on all the neglect my bike had suffered since the last time I had it tuned up.  Well, I dumped some money into a new chain, some new tires and tubes, and a service plan.  I have to confess, my poor bike has been through a lot this summer, and I didn't do a lot to clean things up.  I forget how many miles I'm actually putting on that bike these days. 
  I put another 92.5 miles on my bike with the new Zipps.  It was a great ride.  I did my Usery pass loop (45 miles), and set a new PR of 2:59.  I wasn't really pushing for speed either, since I knew I had another 55 miles to go, but these new wheels are rocking!  I switched from my Armadillo to Gatorskin tires though, and my poor gatorskins couldn't handle the piss-poor job my neighborhood's landscapers did of cleaning up after the mesquite trees they'd trimmed.  Unfortunately, I didn't buy any new 60mm stem tubes, so I walked my bike home.  I was only a mile and a half from home, so not a huge inconvenience.  I guess I could have patched the tube, but sometimes you just want to go home and chill with the hubby and cook something nice for dinner.  I made turkey meatballs which I had been meaning to make for over a month, but they take too long, and I have been incredibly busy.
  I feel like I've been pushing through the summer with my head down, gutting out workouts I don't want to do because it is too hot or I am too tired.  I have been finishing rides and runs with dehydration headaches, and wishing I could just give up on the whole thing.  The temperature drop this week let me enjoy myself for a change, and I finally remember why I signed up for this race in the first place!  Am I ready for this race?  I ran 20 miles yesterday, and I'm not sore.  I can finish 100 miles on my bike in 6:40.  I can swim 4000 yards without any left shoulder pain, and I have done 2 miles in open water.  If the race was next week, I would probably do ok.  Thankfully, I still have 6 weeks, and that is plenty of time to build speed and confidence.  But, I am in a good spot right now, and that is encouraging.  I wasn't sure things would fall in place, and I'm happy to see myself getting stronger in so many ways.

Finding Balance

  Our lives are generally filled with a variety of people and things that need chunks of our time throughout the week.  If you are anything like me, you have a list of "things to do" which is continually growing, and requires constant reprioritizations.  For some of us, this list is the source of our stress, and for others, the list is what keeps them sane.  I had been told in a church group that you can look at where you spend your money to know what you prioritize, but I think a better tool is to look at this list, and know what you don't prioritize.  I am guilty of neglecting my car, my bicycle, my workouts, and my husband this weekend.  I did manage to take care of my chores around the house, got some errands run at the pharmacy that I'd been putting off, spent quality time with a quality friend, and even managed to spend some time with family from out of town.  Every day is spent deciding what will take up each hour of each day.  To me, there is no "free" time.  There is only the time that could be spent knocking off one of the 30 items on that to-do list. 
  Training for ironman takes up a lot of "free" time.  I had a lot of great workouts this weekend including a personal record setting 6:40 century ride, my first 4 miles running at south mountain, a 20 mile run- all outside for the first time since Australia, and a 3500 yd swim where my left shoulder held up the entire way.  These are all great, but that is 12 hours of the weekend dedicated to training- and I slacked off!  I missed swim drills, spin class, a 20 mile bike ride, and weight training.  The time I spend training is often "me-time", where I can reflect on life and enjoy the feeling of accomplishing a difficult workout.  The will-power required to get through some of these workouts is often more than I have available to me.  Trying to constantly get myself to do things because I should can really wear on me, and leaves me mentally exhausted.  I always thought of training as "taking care of my needs/wants".  Sometimes it is just that, but other times, it is just another chore I need to finish. 
  Last week was a week of chore workouts.  I didn't do many of my key workouts because I just felt tired.  I caught up on a lot of sleep, which was needed, but I felt like I had failed as an athlete.  I remember thinking I would never be ready for the race, that I just wasn't in the right shape to succeed.  I had completed a 2 mile open water swim for the first time that week, but I did not make an effort to stay focused on the positive because I did not understand that dwelling on my initial failure would only feed my next.
  This week is different.  First, my workouts were not all chores.  I was able to go a new route on my bike- which was beautiful, by the way.  I set an easy goal for my first outdoor hill workout.  But, most importantly, I let myself be imperfect.  I felt guilty about things, yes, but I did not dwell on who/what was neglected, but tried to focus on what got accomplished and who I spent my time with.  Yes, I do need to take my car in still, and my dogs didn't get walked every day, and sure I missed some good workouts.  But, I did a lot of housework, got to hike with Isha, run with Pepe, spend time with my dad, see my aunt and uncle, visit with a friend, go out to a movie with Steve, and even took 2 hours to have my hair done so I could finally feel feminine.  I still have plenty to get to on my list, and of course it is always in the back of my mind, but I will get one thing checked off at a time, and feel proud for getting it done.  And, at the end of the week, if I am smiling, and the people I love are smiling too, then I have balanced things well, and I can let go of the guilt for not getting every item checked off my list because there are only so many hours in the day, and I have spent them well.